breaking up is hard (awkward) to do

I wrote this a while ago and then never posted - it's kind of funny so I share

I had a conversation with a friend recently about the most awkward kiss we had ever experienced (story for another day) which got me thinking about awkward breakups to all breakups/severing of relationships I've had, so I thought I'd share some basic details of those experiences

-the time former BF had his best friend flirt with me all night so I didn't feel as bad when he broke up with me later that night
-the time I wanted to end things and boy didn't so instead of taking me home, he sped up the canyon late at night full of rage until I changed my mind. when that didn't happen and he finally turned around, he ended the night telling me all the bad things I do to destroy relationships before finally taking me home and then again telling me to call him if I changed my mind
-the time I took 6+ hours, 3 different locations to breakup with a BF; in tears the entire time. I still feel bad for putting him through that misery. it then took over a year for things to be final
-the time I raised my hand as if in class to tell him I had something to say and could only get out, "I can't do this anymore," while pointing to the both of us (not so good with words)
-the time former BF ended things in a matter of two minutes and I didn't have a chance to say a word; he was in and out before I could even process what he said
-the time I had his best friend deliver the bad news since it was the 4th time breaking up with him
-the time(s) I had to sit in his car while he waited for me to say something to make him feel better about breaking up with me
-the text that says, "I'm not interested in anything past being friends," and he mysteriously stops texting you
-the time I put someone back in the friend zone without giving him a chance to really say anything
-the time he didn't talk to me for 30 minutes in the car and then basically pushed me out the door
while the car was still moving to drop me off
-the time he told me I wasn't a decent human being after one phone conversation
-the time he gave me the fade out, then promised it wasn't the fade out and he hadn't forgotten about me, and then never called again
-the time I told him not to waste his time by trying to ask me out again

nothing ever seems to go smoothly for me during a break up; but after the shock wears off, I've got some great stories