Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Weapons Classes for Priesthood Brethren

my dad signed up for a series of weapons classes for the up-coming year. this was done through his elder's quorum and this is the list of subjects to be covered:

jan - concealed weapons training
feb - using laser sighting for your hand gun
mar - shoot gun home defense
apr - sniper rifle training
may - most effective kill points
june - .30 caliber air cooled machine gun training
jul - automatic weapons training (we have the opportunity to purchase 45 cal. Thompson hand held machine guns)
aug - dillon aero M134 6000 rounds per minute gatling gun training
sept - how to use and maintain 3.5 hand held anti personal rocket launcher
oct - hand held stinger missile training
nov - light armor training
dec - heavy armor training

it is concluded with this sentence "wimps and sissies are not allowed or welcome. our motto is "don't tread on me" or "blood, glory, and guts."

all i can say it that i am staying far, far away from wherever they hold these classes, someone is going to get hurt.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

the woes of a pb & j


this past week all I wanted for lunch was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich - a simple request that just couldn't be filled. why you ask? I will tell you

sunday night: we had no bread

monday night: the peanut butter had disappeared

tuesday night: I forgot to plan ahead and woke up too late wednesday to make the sandwich

wednesday night: finally, I made my pb & j for the next day, and then remembered that we were bringing lunch in on thursday (and I was not saying no to a kneader's turkey bacon avocado)

thursday night: I was already prepared to take my sandwich on friday

friday: I went home for lunch and made a grilled cheese sandwich because it was warm and I was cold

all I wanted was a simple pb & j, but the universe didn't seem to want me to have one. maybe I'll have better luck this week.

for Kali. . .

the conversation below was not one I got to experience first hand; it is just one I had the privilege of overhearing.

let's just say I'm fairly good at eavesdropping on the right conversations.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

you know your conversation might be struggling if it goes a little something like this

boy: "so you drove down and then drove back?"
girl: "no I flew down and then flew back"
awkward pause
boy: "oh. . .so you, you flew down. . .and then flew back?"